I swear. Recently… EVERY time I’m preparing to go on television & purchasing groceries at the market… I, coincidentally, ALWAYS end up checking out with the SAME cashier. No matter the day, time of day or cash register. SAME LADY.
Now this bit of serendipity has both it’s benefits & consequences:
BENEFIT – Small talk with a nice elderly lady every couple weeks. Not horrible.
CONSEQUENCE – Whenever I’m scheduled on television, typically I’ll bring along significant volumes of alcohol to share new man-tastic beverage concoctions, of an adult-flavored nature.
That said, based upon a history of multiple 7-minute conversations, I’m 100% confident this cashier woman does NOT watch TV, access the internet, or participate in any form of social media. At all.
Also, I’m 110% SURE I’ve never told her I cook on television… Or, for that matter, the food I’m purchasing is intended for television.
So. Here’s my well-considered conclusion. That cashier lady definitely thinks I’m a massive DRUNK. Not your run of the mill alcoholic… But, a straight up rockstar-style, waking up outside on the back patio (with one shoe missing), closet-boozing MANIAC.
Why? Because when she observes the sizable degree of beer cases, liquor bottles, & boxes of wine in my cart… without hesitation, in her sweet old voice, she inquisitively (with one eyebrow raised & a smidgen of concern in her tone) asks, “Throwing a Party??!”
And I ALWAYS reply, straight-faced… “No, ma’am. Just thirsty this morning.”
And… The. Look. On. Her. Face = PRICELESS + HILARIOUS!
probably feel bad. Maybe even just a little. But, it’s all in the name of FUN! Someday I’ll let her know. But, for the foreseeable future I shall make it a point to pro-actively seek out my favorite cashier… And, ensure the continuation of this nonsensical grocery market shenanigans.
Okay. Now. Onto taste-testing, double-checking & preparing beverages for 2 segments tomorrow on NBC’s EightWest. CHEERS & Happy Non-Labor Day!